One particular participant reminded me why the connection to the soma is so significantly important to me, especially in stressful situations. This woman had just moved to e different country to start a job. She was dealing with numerous documentation processes concerning her residence in the country, other organizations, and training for a new position at work which made her feel anxious and insecure.
After a small talk at the beginning to set the intention and mood for the session, I guided her through a body scan to see which direction we should follow. She had a desire to work with the feet and toes, and we concentrated on the area. Soma’s movements and exercises strengthened the Achilles heel, which she experienced as “missing”. It felt her connection to the earth was absent and needed restoration. All this stress had made her lose contact with the ground. We tried looking for ways to strengthen the lower part of the legs until she felt her stability more present. The uncertainty she was sensing at the beginning felt more distant.
Asking her if there is a sensation underneath that has become more available after moving, the participant shared further she felt she is “not enough,” “incompetent,” and she may not succeed in her job. Worries revolving around how to be integrated into a completely new society overwhelmed her mind.
I encouraged her to express the emotions through movement and sound. Her body started walking around anxiously. There was a sense of inability for her to find space in her body and the room. Something underneath urged to be expressed. Her arms began pushing down forcefully with palms facing down. As the participant gathered more and more strength, she pushed away from the fear, opening space for her being to emerge. Exhaling sounds helped to release the repetitive movements.
Every move released tension and relaxed the soma. The participant explained her head still had some tension from the anxiety. In dialogue, it became clear she had forgotten to stay present within her body in the past weeks. With no time to stretch or do any type of somatic practice, the stress levels had increased. We both remembered and reminded each other that going back to the body brings the stress levels down, making the worried psyche return to the soma. Somatic practices provide a sensation of bodily boundaries, and these boundaries bring one back to the present moment.
Participant’s Reflection:
The biggest shift that occurred during the bodywork session was a shift from the psychological fear of social rejection to healthy concern about my physical well-being. Starting the session from a space of anxiety and insecurity due to major changes in my life, I mainly felt psychologically repressed and physically ungrounded. In the course of several movements and work with the feet and legs, the inner tension between 1) the psychological fears of failure and social survival and 2) self-care and physical well-being emerged. After more free movement aimed at breaking down the impasse between the two, I felt sorrow and loss.
After some more work, I came to realize that because of the above psychological fears, I, as my ego-consciousness, had turned against my own self-care, thus blocking my self-healing processes. I was also able to get some insight into the socially conditioned beliefs about the inferiority of the living body compared to the mind in the sense that it would always come last on the “to-do list.”
This was very profound and wouldn’t have happened in the session without Yoana’s approach of allowing enough space for the vital energies to unravel in their own way. Afterward, I felt a glow in my body that could only come from a re-established connection between soma and psyche. I can still get back to that feeling of freedom and spaciousness even though I sometimes lose track of it in the face of outer demands.